Hello, folks, how are you
doing? I hope all is well with you, and I hope you had a good summer,
because today is October, 10 or 12th and the summer is just about over.
So here's wishing you a good summer. This is going to be a probably
relatively long podcast, because I haven't been here in a while, and I'm
here to explain why I haven't been here in four or five months. I guess
I can get explicit in some things. I'll try not to get too explicit if I
don't have to. Well, my summer started off like every other summer, and
I was moving into my rental unit, carrying some boxes, and it hurt my
back, not unlike a hurt that I've done many times in the past, like we
all have. Usually when you hurt your back, it takes, I don't know,
months before it to get better, but you can see the progression weekly
as it gets better. And yeah, it's still sore, and you can't bend this
way and you can't bend that way, but it does get better. Well, I did
that hurt my back, and it progressively got worse. It didn't get any
better, and I was very dumbfounded to see the least, not understanding
what's going on. I never felt like that, and I was trying all kinds of
relief and cold and hot and pink pills and eye views and everything
under the sun. This went on for about a month. Then it got to a point
where I was pretty much bedridden, and I could not get out of bed, other
than probably crawling at the time.
It was very, very,
very painful. And all my friends that I had known in my coffee shop that
I went to all told me that, go see a doctor. You don't look good.
There's something wrong. Well, being the stubborn person that I am, I
went on with this longer, and eventually did get to a point where I had
to call, I had to call it quits, and I ended up calling the ambulance,
and I was taken to the hospital, where the doctor proceeded to do some
tests and tell me that my blood looked like chicken noodle soup and that
I needed to be shipped off to a hospital, selfish here bigger one more
specialized in the medicine. So off I went. This was about August 12,
and I got down, shipped down to a bigger hospital, and they proceeded to
do their tests, and there was a multitude of them, and they came back
and told me that I now had multiple myeloma, which is a blood cancer.
Understand, this is the second cancer I've had in my life, not the same
two different ones. I beat 125 years ago, and now I've got another one. I
was pretty shocked, and was quite a shock to the system, since I
thought at the time, and I still do that, I've been doing everything
right in my life, or at least to the best I could, eating right,
exercising, riding my bike, walking, taking my vitamins, watching what I
eat, watching my weight, etc, etc, etc. I was doing everything I
possibly could. And out of the clear blue, kaboom, I've got multiple
myeloma, so I've spent two and a half months in the hospital. I lost 30
plus pounds,
and the diagnosis was confirmed. Ended up
finally getting home about three weeks ago, I want to say September, 15
or 17th, somewhere like that. I finally got back into my apartment
and I'm currently undergoing chemotherapy once a week,
and
they tell me that they can not cure this disease, but they can keep it
at bay forever, as long as they need to. Well, here's the point of this
podcast. It's not that I was sick and I got sick, but yeah, I was under.
I was under some ideas, pretty rigid in my ideas, and you can see that
on my website, and I still believe in a lot of them. But here's the one
that really was hard for me. While I was in the hospital, I was given
the ultimatum, you need a blood transfusion or you die? First thing that
came to mind was, What if I get the blood from someone who was Vaxxed
through the covid 19? I know I said I've never I would never do that.
But in retrospect, if you look back when you're faced with the
Alternative Death, you will do whatever you need to do to survive. That
strength to survive is probably one of the strongest, if not the
strongest, reaction we have, and it's in everybody. Yes, I could have
said no blood transfusion, and I wouldn't be doing this podcast today,
but I did take it, and as a matter of fact, I got a couple of them, and
I'm here to talk about it, even though in my blog, you know, I I said no
covid, 19 Vax, and I still won't take the VAX, but who knows what I've
got in the blood transfusion. My point being when you're faced with that
wall, when you're faced with a life and death situation will probably
more than likely do what it takes to survive, and I did. Am I proud of
it? Yeah, because I'm going to beat this sucker. I'm going to get
better. So a lot of the things I talk about in my podcasts are on this
website. Some of them have been outdated, and that's one of them. Okay,
again, will I march down and get the jab in the arm? Absolutely not.
Will I get any jabs in the arm? Absolutely not. But I did have to make a
decision at that point, and I'm here to talk about it. There's a reason
I'm here, and this, again, is another point. This is point B of this
bog. There's a reason I'm here. There's a reason I this is the second
cancer I've had, and I'm gonna beat it. But there's a reason I'm here,
and I am looking for that reason. I don't know if I know the answer to
it yet, but I really believe there's something greater I need to do. It
was not my time yet. I need to do something greater. I've got years to
do that, and I will have years to do that, but it's a reality you're
faced with, and you have to look at it, and you have to come to terms
with it, make your decisions, accept the results and accept the
decision, because there's no Turning back. There's no reversing a
decision like that. Okay, so part B, why am I here? This is number two,
folks, most people only get number one. I've got number two. And it's
not a death sentence. It can be It can't be cured, but it can be treated
for 50 years. I imagine at some point in time it'll be curable. I'll be
right around the corner. But why am I here? I struggle with that to
this day. I thought I knew before. I thought I had a good idea before
you go authors through the website, you'll see most of those answers.
But now I'm starting to rethink that, not in different terms. But
there's a bigger picture here that I'm not quite getting yet. There's
something larger that I'm not understanding, that I'm not seeing.
Hopefully someday I'll see it, and it'll make this little bit easier to
accept and understand.
But in a nutshell, that's where
I've been. Does it make it make you gonna stop doing these? Well,
obviously I'm not gonna stop doing these podcasts. We're gonna continue
with them. They're going to continue going on. I still have my beliefs,
and I hold them dear. Some things I've learned, sometimes a belief might
need to be changed a little bit. Sometimes it can't be in concrete. And
that was something I did. I put everything in concrete. Sometimes
everything cannot go on. Concrete things have got to be malleable. They
got to be able to go with the times. So I took the blood transfusions, I
did what I had to do to be here. And there's a reason I'm still here. I
know it'll come to me. I know I'll find that reason out, but it's just
going to take some time, and time is all I have right now. I'm healing
slowly walking with a cane, because multiple myeloma affects your bone
structure. I can it did me. It affected my hips and my left leg, and
there was a point where I couldn't walk. Couldn't walk without a walker.
Now I just use that to scoot around the apartment, and I use a cane
most of the time. So what is getting slowly better? The chemo treatments
are not too bad. They're better than what they were with cancer belt
number 125, years ago. So they've gotten better over time. So keep your
heads up. Keep strong. Realize that things are done for a reason, and
you're here for a reason. You came here for a reason, although you might
not know it, as I don't know exactly what that reason is, yet someday
you all know, and it's very important. Obviously, mine is very
important. Otherwise I wouldn't be here. So I want to keep trying to
plug and push these out, but I felt the need to tell you all why it's
been so long and where I am. Please visit my Patreon page. If you can,
donations would be appreciated during this time of medical charges,
believe me, this is not cheap. Yeah, I'm paying for it every time I go
and I pay for it. Your donations would help on Patreon, even $1 would
help, but that's all I'm going to say about that. It's easy to get
there. You can see the links I'm going to say Namaste. God bless you
all. Stay strong and we will be talking to you soon. Goodbye. You.
